47

Sometimes I realize I'm forty seven. It just smacks me in the face.
My age didn't used to bother me. I just went on in life, happy go lucky, well go lucky mostly. Happy is a relative term, I'm happy a lot, but define happy. Any way, I can't believe I'm 47.

I spend 9 hours a day at work writing, then I come home and after I feed, bathe and put my girls to bed, what do I do? I go write. Not the things I ought to write, like my screenplays and stories, but this blog here. I am so tired, and instead of sleeping, I'm writing.

You know that phrase, there is always tomorrow.

I think I have lived my life by that phrase. But I'll let you in on a little secret.

No, there is not always a tomorrow.

If you read this and think that I'm contemplating something dramatic, no, I'm not.

I believe you get one go around at life, and while you may think "Damn Steve, you should have done more by now." I've done quite a bit.
For me, this all makes sense as I write it, but this world and I, we have never been a good fit. I say 2 plus 2 equals four, and the world tells me I said 5. I don't understand the world, and I never will.

No, this is not a prelude to something dramatic. I'm not depressed, a little disconsolate perhaps, I'm 47. Still that is a fine thing to be, 47.

No it isn't.

47, and gaining more scalp by the day. When did I get so old?

Still,

The most important part of my life lies sleeping a few feet away, Is I write this.

My two daughters.

So you see

There are no more tomorrows, all that is left are todays.

Goodnight, sleep tight, wake up shiny and bright.